What is Your Why?

Posted by Steve Grossman on Aug 8, 2011 in Why I Failed

In my last column, I wrote about the reasons I failed in the music business and ended with this one:

My WHY wasn’t big enough – yes, I wanted to be a musician, but I didn’t want it bad enough to do the things that it took to be a success. And though this last reason sounds like I wimped out when the going got tough, that’s not what it means at all. But that will have to wait until next time.

This column is the next time.

Motivation

We all have things we want. Whether they are material, experiential or emotional, there are desires burning deep within us, and there is absolutely nothing wrong with this fact. These desires are the motivation that keep people moving forward and keep getting you up each morning to pursue a career in the arts.

Ask most musicians what their “why” is, and they’ll say, “I want to play” and I was no exception. I played drums from the age of two and chose it as a career because it was the logical and fun choice. All I ever wanted to do was play!

Two Sets of Whys

But what you or I want to do is only one half of the story because we all have two sets of whys.

In addition to the hopes and dreams surrounding what you can do, you also have dreams and hopes about evenings with friends, walks along the beach, a romantic trip to Paris or taking the kids to Disney World. These are dreams and hopes about life.

My Why

If you had asked me what my “why” was when I was working as a drummer, I would’ve said, “I want to make a living in the music business.” It is the primary reason I failed to build a long-term, successful music business career.

Want: I wanted to play drums because (a) I could, (b) I was good at it and (c) it was fun. Sounds like a hobby. Wanting to do something is a weak reason to choose a life’s profession.
Living: “Making a living” is an honorable and common goal, but there are two huge problems with this statement: First, it is vague. What exactly is a living? Second, it can be accomplished by doing anything. Which brings me to:
Music business: Just like “making a living,” music business is also vague. There are thousands of ways to make a living in the music business.

Put those all together and you can see that “I want to make a living in the music business” is a small and weak why. It would’ve been just as effective to have said, “If it’s not too much trouble, I’d like to earn enough money to survive by doing anything you have for me to do that’s related to music because I like music.”

Your Whys

My advice is that you figure out ALL your whys. Why do you want to be a musician and what will it ultimately mean to you? Why are you pursuing your career choice? Is it because you HAVE to do it because of an intense passion? Are you seeking approval (ouch…)? Is it because you’re good at it and you think you can “make it?” Is it because you don’t know what else to do?

And what will a music career do for you personally and for your LIFE? What are your personal dreams? What makes you come alive other than music? What does living for THESE things look like? How much money do you need to be alive in this way?

Lastly, is there balance? If the answer is yes, something’s wrong. There should NOT be balance. Though there will be times when you’ll have to work hard at your career, your life goals should ALWAYS be supported by and therefore above your career goals.

What good is making a living if you don’t make a life in the process?